looks cool

DEATHDRAGON

09.23.2009 12:00 AM

it looks interesting, i like the artwork.

LINKO

09.22.2009 12:00 AM

I think this story has great potential. I do agree that the story is a bit jumpy, but that might be able to fixed with more pages and chapters, but the art captures my eyes and the beasts and character designs are so interesting. The only thing I don't like is the fact the character's girl is Raven. Just not a pleasant name unless there is a reason for it other than her hair color.

KURAXSAKI

08.15.2009 12:00 AM

Great art, but the plot seems jumpy and rough. Definite potential though.

EMMEJO

06.21.2009 12:00 AM

Great Artwork, but the overall plot seems flawed. But it is hard to tell since this is only the first chapter. But that last part with the tattoo on his back was really creative.

HALO11

06.10.2009 12:00 AM

Very nice!

PULSEBREAKER

06.05.2009 12:00 AM

Definitely has potential. Needs some pacing work, but otherwise a solid start.

PHOENIXFIREV

05.31.2009 12:00 AM

The artwork is very clean and liked the fact that it used Mayan mythology. I want it to be continued.

HEROESFANGIRL66

05.24.2009 12:00 AM

i am pulled in. i want to read the whole thing! i hope it comes out as a story.

CHIBIMERMAID

05.14.2009 12:00 AM

Artwork is nice. Pacing needs fine-tuning. Story intro is somewhat cliché, but plot has potential.

MORNCREEK

03.28.2009 12:00 AM

the art reallly is amazing, but the story is all a bit too sudden for the reader to be drawn in properly. but it is competely awesome if it's just slowed down. =D

VAMPIREACT

03.07.2009 12:00 AM

Your artworks are amazing! Your characters might need some work and your storyline is a little cliche. But I can see this going far ^^ just keep it up!

ALOFA

02.17.2009 12:00 AM

the plot is stupid and generic. its like Bleach but crappy (bleach is ok) its the typical boy meets girl scenerio and changes his life he gets powers blah blah blah. only thing is this blows. i bet this crap was made by tokyopop themselves

SCREWZ07

02.15.2009 12:00 AM

in fact natsuki89 sed all that i wanted to say its garbage seen the plot a billion times

SCREWZ07

02.15.2009 12:00 AM

i didnt quit understand weavers war but 4 sum reson i want to read more of it! lol

NEONUSRAT

01.19.2009 12:00 AM

Nice artwork and looks like this is going to be a good story. I can't wait for the next chapter! :-)

WLCM2MYWORLD

12.31.2008 12:00 AM

Very beautiful artwork. Don't be discouraged by the negative comments. Nitpicking over the details of an incomplete story is easy and pointless. This pilot successfully sets up an interesting scene with much room for development. I look forward to reading more - and the artwork is outstanding. :)

JEDWARDH

12.18.2008 12:00 AM

The artwork is really nice. It’s obvious that you have a command on the anime/manga style. However, there are flaws in the storytelling. The idea of the blood beast is very creative, but I agree with the other commenters, it should have come earlier. The look your heroine gives on the bottom of page 26 feels fake and on pages 9 and 11, the boy’s expressions are stiff. What happened to enemy’s men? You see them on page 18 but you don’t see them again. The blood beast is told to take out the enemies but you don’t really see it. Then the villain refers to his fallen enemies. That seems weird. Also, the actions shots are a bit confusing. On pg 30, it seems illogical for the villain to ask her why she still fights. She just lost something she was supposed to protect and her friend died. Make her get angry. Also on page 29, the look on her face seems to be very timid even though she’s shouting. That doesn’t work. You have good ideas, with the blood beast, warring sides, and the Quetzalquatl, but some background seems to be missing. I didn’t understand the boy’s transformation at all. If you are making some reference to the Quetzalcoatl (which according to your illustrations and words, it seems you are), the Aztec legend, then say so. Some foreshadowing of his transformation would have been nice. Good start, but think more about what motivates each character and what their goals are. Then the plot will follow.

FADEAWAY

12.09.2008 12:00 AM

This is so Cool!

NARUMI13HEARTNET

12.07.2008 12:00 AM

The Art work is exceptional! This pilot gives so much room to explore with the story, and I would like to see more.

ANNELIZZ

11.06.2008 12:00 AM

I would have to agree with someone else the artwork is exceptional beyond just the toning. I would love to see future works and more of the story unfold.

CELTICANGEL

11.06.2008 12:00 AM

The art is is amazing and I would love to see the rest of this. Go go guys. All those nay-sayers obviously don't know a good manga when they read one.

UNDERWORLDER666

11.06.2008 12:00 AM

the art is okay but, the action scenes are pathetic, you need to learn how to portray motion better. the layout also needs allot of work. everything else I have to say has already been covered.

HARUNII

10.19.2008 12:00 AM

*sigh* like with a lot of other pilots on this page, the artwork is fairly well done. You can tell a lot of work went into the toning in this one. However, there is a lack of real plot with this one and the others- I found it hard to read and actually couldn't get through it. Sorry, but that is just something that needs to be worked on.

RYAVEN

10.19.2008 12:00 AM

I love the art!! >_< The dialog is lacking a bit and I was also a little confused with what was going on.

SASAMI86

10.09.2008 12:00 AM

Art is very good; don't get discouraged by the negative comments. It's not too bad. There is room for improvement for the story... remember, to make a good manga, there must be a harmony of two things: art and literature. Man, now I'm lecturing... >_< Well, all I have to say is that you're going in the right direction. Please don't give up. :)

LADYDARKNESS

10.04.2008 12:00 AM

This manga is not very good. Even though the art is exeptional, the plot so far = BAD. The dialogue was one of the worst. At first I thought it was okay, but after it got to tehr part with the villan, it became really lame. Thsoe are the most corniest, cheesiet, cliched lines I've heard/read in centuries! All three of them villan (especially), male and female main character has bad dialogues. The pacing, in my opinion, was certainly too fast. So fast until none of it makes sense. No way Arden could want to protect Raven so fast, scenes are unclear, messy presentation in storyline. I find the characters annoying as soon at the villan part came... I find no emphasis, intensity or real emotions and feeling in any of the scenes, even though the art is not bad. the whole thing itself was corny.

SILENTLY

09.24.2008 12:00 AM

This is awful. Your "heroine" is a moron. Why didn't she transform the MOMENT your terribly cliched villian (seriously, some of the lamest dialogue i've read in awhile, way to make him in no way scary) showed up, kicked his bottom and saved the day? Rather she is pathetic and waits until the situation has gone to hell: the innocent guy she just met has been stabbed, the relic destroyed and the villian walking all over her. You gave no reason for her not to have immediately used her powers and saved Arden and i can only think that it's a) some sort of massive oversight on your part's or b) some attempt at a lame plot twist, which doesn't at all work. Moving onto your villian, he is AWFUL! His dialogue is SO bad i could barely be bothered reading it. Quite honestly, i think i have read this EXACT dialogue a thousand other times: in other words, he is a carbon copy of all terrible magic girl and shoujo comic book villians. Re-work this to make some sort of logical sense, because all you have right now is a pathetic Magical Girl, Cliched Villian and a vaugely interesting Bishie. Lastly: why did you use the terrible, over-worked plot device in which the mysterious newbie shows someone, immediately, part or all of their deep-dark secret? Way to make her dumber than a tree.

NATSUKI89

09.23.2008 12:00 AM